I think I'm somewhere around.....here

I always have trouble figuring out where I reside in terms of being a runner. A sort of running identity crisis. I'm new to the game and never did this to any level before. I think the closest I got was running one lap around a cinder track in the 70's in Junior High health class as part of the 'participaction' awards tests...I recall it nearly killed me. So I have no background other than what I've accumulated over the past 5 years.

I've seen a lot of people who were quite involved in their high school years or in college, etc. or just people who have been at it for decades on end. I don't consider myself as any part of a 'boom', it's just something I'd always wanted to do and one morning headed out the door and started. I'm not in it for any trendiness it might carry.

I don't think of myself as slow, but I certainly don't consider myself as being anyways fast either. A couple of years ago after completing a pretty competitive level 5k one spring morning, one of the local fast guys (part of a very small but talented running club) who has seen me in the park came up and introduced himself, saying "I see you in the park a lot...so how'd you do today?". When I told him my time of 20:05, he just kinda nodded and walked away. Elite snobery? Sure was (methinks he thought maybe I would fit into their group and were approaching for recruitment, but my recreational numbers didn't quite jive with the 'requirements' I guess). But it certainly shows that I'm really not at any level that would make anyone with talent say "hey...that's pretty good!".

If I were midpack, I'd probably be pretty comfortable running with the masses and finishing in the thick of the mob as they squeeze their way over the finishing mats. If I were at the back, I could probably let loose and have fun and really not pay much attention to time, instead just enjoy the surroundings. If I were at the front I'd be fierce and competitive and work strategies throughout the race working to snag those all-important awards positions that everyone else considers waaaay out of scope.

Instead, I'm somewhere between the top and the mid. I'm not going to win many awards (I occasionally snag an a/g placement) and certainly no prize money or trophies to sit on a mantle. I'm not slow enough to just slog through it so I end up having to push to make sure I'm not passed near the end. My rewards usually come with seeing the mass of people yet to finish, finding my way to the food tables without lineups, maybe spotting some faces that are in my league and they'll be my adversaries for the day. It's finishing in that top 15% or so, knowing that I've held my ground and I'm not retrograding into 'jogger' territory.

I'm not anything to brag about. People do far better doing far less work than I do. It's a lot of effort for little or no tangible return, and it can be expensive to boot.

Can't quit now though.